There are many movies that come to mind when thinking about the loss of a main character. The one that moved me the most was “P.S. I Love You.” It begins by showing a young couples day to day life– where the wife is constantly complaining and worrying about the future; while her husband was more laid back and fun loving. The movie fast forwards to a bar scene where friends and family are gathered to celebrate his passing of a brain tumor. In doing this, the media skipped right over the whole dying process. In fact, the movie never showed the initial diagnosis, treatment, his suffering and his actual death. He knew his death would make her lose her will to live, so he planned for notes, cakes, and activities to be delivered to her over the next year. Knowing he wanted her to move on, he encouraged her to go out of her comfort zone and view life more optimistically.
This movie has inspired me to: not sweat the small stuff, appreciate every day and never take your loved ones for granted. I’ve learned even if you’re faced with adversity there may be better opportunities that present themselves which may not have been recognized before. Through this movie I now fear death less knowing that our loved ones will always have an influence on our lives, even after they are gone. In “P.S. I Love You” his death was celebrated and instead of mourning he wanted his family and friends to focus on the good times they shared together and continue to see life as he did.
In our American culture we deny feelings that are painful– death being one of these. This allows us to emotionally distance ourselves from the inevitable. In “P.S. I Love You” death and dying were never addressed which is how the media often deals with this subject. Keeping the audience entertained is their main focus without dwelling on real pain, suffering and emotion. They accomplished this by not always use direct language when addressing death, instead using terms like, “passed on” or “no longer with us” but the overall idea is understood.
Each of us has different life experiences which influence our outlook on death and the way we grieve. No two people are alike.