Planning ahead


This thanksgiving my mom and stepdad came up to visit me. As my stepdad and I were out side deep-frying the turkey we got to talking about his up coming retirement and if he should collect a lump sum or monthly payments from his work? I then started asking him about his health because he is in the early stages of COPD from smoking for so many years. At this point I start talking to him about medical cost and how expensive your last six months can be and that it could potentially eat up the vast majority of his retirement leaving mom with very little to live on.

The big plus he mentioned is that his and my moms plot is already picked out and paid for so that’s one less thing for my mom to have to worry about for when the time comes. I asked him which oddly did not seem that difficult, “Realistically if you had to pick a life expectancy how long do you think you will live to.” He replied without hesitation, ”I think I can make to 76 and I will be happy with that.”

As we talked I was happy to hear that my step dad was not denying his potential future death. He did in fact want to have a plan setup so that when he does pass my mom will have to worry as little as possible.

In my family were are open about discussing death and what we would like to happen if any event were to ever take place. We all refuse to be kept alive by a machine that provides no quality of life for us. This may seem odd to some, but the fact remains death is going to come to all of us, so why deny the inevitable. This may sound crazy, but embrace it. Live your life your life as best as you can with no regrets, but have a plan set in place for when the time does come. Just because it’s easy for us I’m sure can be very difficult for most.


One thought on “Planning ahead

  1. Before taking this class, I can honestly say I had thought very little about my end of life decisions. After the lessons about advanced directives I did have a conversation with my parents about their end of life wishes. I felt some relief knowing what they would want in case of an emergency. I informed them of my wishes as well. I wasn’t surprised that so few Americans have openly expressed their death and dying concerns, because I hadn’t done so either. It’s good that you and your family were able to do the same. Americans are really living in a death denying culture and I can see that more every day.

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