Coming Together


When I first decided to take this class I thought it was going to be an easy class that I was taking for fun. A week before classes started I found out that a close friend of mine had been shot and killed the night before after we had left Applebees. That moment rocked my hold world and made me have a different view of this class. I came into this class more confused about death then I have ever been. The only other death I had experienced was that of my grandpa whom I was never really close with because of family issues. When my friend died I truly felt the pain that i’ve heard so much about because I had a strong connection with him. I remember walking into the funeral home and just seeing people everywhere crying. At that point in time I realized what an impact a death can have on those around us. At times it may seem like nobody cares about us and that we have no one to turn to, but in that funeral home I saw how many people showed up to pay their respects to my friend and realized that we have more people that care about us than we think.

My friends death was acknowledged, but his life was celebrated. The impact he had on others went unnoticed until he died and people reflected on him. This shows that death, no matter how terrible a tragedy, brings people together to recognize the impact a person had on them. There may not be many things that can help console a family through a death of a child, but my friends family was at ease because of their faith in God. They believe that because my friend loved God with all his heart that he is up in heaven watching over all of us and does not want us to grieve for him. Religion is a powerful tool in helping people overcome the grimness of death because it provides comfort in knowing that their spirit lives on and his watching over them.

By taking this class I have learned that it is important to find something or someone that can help prepare and console us during the death of a loved one. Even though we may not understand death, it is important that we shift our focus to the impact that our loved ones leave behind and how that impact will shape our future. My friend has personally impacted my life by encouraging me to always be a better person and to put others first. Even though a person has passed, their memories never die.

8 thoughts on “Coming Together

  1. This blog was spot on. It’s crazy how many people actually are affected by one persons death. I remember when my friend died in a car accident in my sophomore year of high school. When I walked into the wake, I had never seen that many people crying before in my entire life. It was for me too, the first person that I had been close with that died. My mom always says too that you can always tell how impactful that person was by how many people show up to their funeral. Lastly, I like how you said his life was celebrated. That’s how I feel funerals should be treated.

  2. First, I want to send my condolences to you and your friends family; I am so sorry for your loss. I agree with you that of course we must grieve and it’s okay to cry and mourn for our lost loved ones, but we shouldnt dwell on the loss and how much we miss them. We should celebrate the life that they had to spend with and the memories we shared with them.

  3. I like how you talked about a personal experience and really showed how a single person can affect one’s life in such a significant way. We often times take someone’s life for granted that they will always be here and never leave us. It is a shame that we do not realize sooner sometimes that the people around us are so precious. We know and love them but we do not fully realize their importance and impact until they are gone. That goes with that saying “You never know what you have until it’s gone.”

  4. First, sorry about your loss. I agree with you that death can bring people together. In fact, at our core, we as humans yearn for comfort and closeness. We are not solitary creatures; we thrive when we work in group and pay attention to one another. On thing I want to mention is that although death can bring us together, it is usually for a short time.For instance, after the 9/11 attacks, Americans were so united. It was just amazing to see! It’s like there were no longer such thing as African Americans, or Irish Americans, Or Italian Americans, or Mexicans — we were all simply Americans. However, most people have forgotten about that feeling since then, and the country is starkly divided.

  5. Death has a funny way of bringing people from all corners of the worlds together. Just this past week the death of Paul Walker brought people from so many communities together, they all even went to the location that they died and joined together to pay their respect. What is also important is how the family is treated also. It is important to give them all the respect and help when they need it the most. Even when it comes to huge tragedies the way that people forget about the bad things, the grudges, racial difference, and so on, and band together to lift each other up from these dark times; is something that still gives me faith that humanity is still there.

  6. I couldn’t agree more with what you’ve said. People during normal life may not particularly like each other, but death somehow seems to bring a lot of these people together and form new bonds between different groups of people. I also originally took this class like you did because I thought it was going to be an easy. Boy was I wrong, not because it was difficult, but because of how interesting it was. I honestly feel I’ve learned more in this class than I have in many others!

  7. I am sorry for your loss. I am glad that your friend’s life was honored. I like how you said that he has impacted you and others by his character. I agree with you in regards to death bringing people together. At my great-grandfather’s funeral, I met family members that I didn’t know existed. It is strange that death brings us together like that when in life, we can become separated from others through all sorts of circumstances.

  8. My Idea of what the class was going to be was similar to that of yours , only I didn’t expect to be leaving depressed and low after every lecture. It is true that death brings families and friends together, I just wish it didn’t take somethingsk permanent for us to realize how lucky we are to be alive no matter what the codicil a are. And that keeping relationships alive are important not only for oneself but for others as well . Being a close knit unit contributes to making grieving easier .

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